Big, Big Love

Last August (summer 2007), I got a call from my friend Bobby who was shooting a short film for a festival contest. The festival was put on by Dances with Films and called the 2-Minute 2-Step. In the competition each filmmaker had 4 hours total to shoot and edit their 2-minute film. Anyhow, Bobby called and asked me if I would come and act in his little film. I said sure and met him on location in West Hollywood at Crunch. Bobby is a great writer, really motivated and keen Director. The script that Bobby was working on that day was written by James Noel Hoban and titled James Lipton is Dead. James lives in Maine and traveled to Los Angeles to be further part of the competition by playing the part of James Lipton. Anyhow, the day went well and Bobby and James won the competition. It was very exciting because what they won was a trip to the set of HBO original series, BIG LOVE!

Everyone had to wait for the writer’s strike be resolved in order to coordinate the visit to BIG LOVE’s; so this week everything aligned and it happened this past week. Not only that, but James was in Maine and could not make the trip so Bobby asked me if I would like to go in James’ place. Ooh hell yeah! I am such a BIG FAN of the show BIG LOVE! I think it’s well written, well acted, and I especially love the storyline. I think the storyline directly challenges antiquated ideas about monogamous relationships. I may not be a Polygamist, but I think I understand some of the idea behind it. Many people think that they have to find that ONE person and ONLY ONE person for the rest of their lives. I think that’s great if it works and it’s by conscious decision. They don’t question it, they just do it by default because that is what we are all taught. I think everyone should explore their own preference for relationship style and decide for themselves; therby eliminating that default non-decision making. On the show, I don’t have a problem with the primary family in focus, most everyone in that family is consenting to the lives they’ve chosen. I’m all for it as long as it’s consensual. I just think that the women should have the same option of having multiple husbands and wives too. Of course there is the question about the kids and their potential suffering. I think the kids do suffer, in a way but not in way that you might immediately think. I think they suffer because they live with this secret about their family’s life. They’re closeted in this really weird way. It’s very much what queers go through being closeted and how it hurts them.

I despise how mainstream culture demonizes things they don’t understand or “claim to not understand”. I actually think they do understand. I mean, how many Mothers out there would love another Mother or two around to help raise the kids. Or more like it: what if a wife just doesn’t feel like giving the obligatory blowjob one night and they can give that duty to a sister-wofe? I get it..

Anyhow, I was able to snap a few pictures while I was on set. The set was ahh-maz-ing and built entirely inside this massive warehouse. I was really excited to meet Jeane Tripplehorm, Bill Paxton, Chloe Sevigny, Amanda Seyfried, and Douglas Smith. We all ate lunch and Bobby and I met with the head writers and creators of the show. It was no coincidence that Will Scheffer and Mark Olsen, the creators of the show, won the film festival that Bobby and James won several years prior. Everyone was really incredibly sweet and eager to say hello and hear about the film Bobby won the festival with. It was a grat day. Click here to see the very few photos I snapped.